A recent study conducted by various universities across the nation has found that in the last five years, the average attention span of most Americans has dwindled drastically. Researchers measured attention spans by observing how long an individual would watch a television show of their choosing before becoming bored with the program and turning to some other activity. The results are startling. The average attention span falls between 1 and 3 minutes. Post-observation interviews revealed that many feel they do not have time to focus that much on television or movies.
When Oprah Winfrey announced Friday that she would end production of her nationally syndicated talk show after next season, millions of unemployed Americans pretended they did not care.
“Opera? I don’t like foreign singing theater,” Jim Ukles said, feigning ignorance as though he knew not who Oprah is. After an hour of repeated questioning, the unemployed former GM salesman cracked.